Wednesday, March 18, 2009
I went to pathology yesterday and saw the right lobe of Meg's liver that was removed and the tumour. I'm sure lots of people think that I'm strange wanting to do that, but it does help me process the whole thing. I did the same with the first huge tumour that she had removed. I wanted to see this cancer; this monstrous disease, that is threatening my Meggie's life. My first sight of it made me gasp a little and the first thing that came out of my mouth was "oh bless....that's part of my little girl...." The lobe of her liver was much bigger than I expected, as was the tumour, but I could clearly see that it was all out, and there in front of me. It made me feel so sad that this "specimin" and all the slices next to it came from my Meg's body, but when I saw the tumour I felt so mad. It was so obviously different and sinister to me. Maybe that's what helps me - being able to actually direct my anger at something physical, instead of just the word "cancer". Whatever it is, I'm glad that I did it, but I hope I never have to see another piece of my little girl on a sterile tray ever again.
Here are a couple of photos taken this afternoon - both sleeping (again!) but she has had a very big week so I'm sure you'll all understand.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Eeehhhh, my Meg....she 'int 'arf tuff!!!! :)
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Yesterday, three of the wonderful oncology nurses; Kate, Michelle and Ramina, came to visit Meg and sang "My Girl" to her which was just gorgeous. I videoed it on my mobile phone with the intention of posting it on the blog, but couldn't get it to work (sorry girls! I know how much you were looking forward to seeing your "moves" on here!) Thanks so much you lovely ladies for making the effort and taking the time out for "my girl" XXX
I went home last night to get some decent sleep, Ellie went to her best friend Toneal's house and stayed over, and Phil stayed with Meg. It was nice to be home, but I missed being with Meg so much. I was a bit of a pest, texting Phil so often for an update on how she was. It's strange; I wanted to be home and have some alone time to think, but when I actually got it I was wandering around like a lost soul and felt very restless. I do know though, that it's important for me to get away from the hospital when I have the opportunity - it makes me a better carer when I come back. Poor Phil got very little sleep last night; the recliners that they have in the room are not the most comfortable to spend a whole night on, and Meg was restless. He'll go home today and hopefully sleep well tonight.
So, Meg and I are now watching Harry Potter - The Goblet of Fire - Meg on the chair and me on the bed! I gave her a bed bath earlier and a change of PJ's and she's nibbling on grapes and drinking lots of water. Her appetite hasn't returned yet but she is managing to eat bits of soft fruit.
Here's my little warrior.......I love her so much..... It's not the best shot of her - she didn't want her photo taken!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Meg is doing really well. The surgery had no complications. She only needed two units of blood during the operation and they removed the right lobe of her liver, her gall bladder and shaved an area off her diaphragm where the tumour had stuck to it. When she came into ICU we were expecting her to still be intubated, but she wasn't, thankfully, and she was breathing on her own. She still had lots of "lines" in; central line in her neck, an arterial line in her wrist, two peripheral lines, a naso-gastric tube, nasal oxygen prongs, two drains coming out of her abdomen, a catheter and an epidural. She was pretty sick when she first came out and vomitted quite a lot, but that settled down eventually. Her central line, one periheral and the arterial lines are now out and she's doing so well that we've been transferred onto the ward and out of ICU! We were originally expecting to be in ICU for up to 4 days so that just shows how incredible she is.
So, we're now in room 7 on ward 5c (if anyone is passing) and she's still very "out of it". She can manage to nod or shake her head, but movement of any kind is really painful for her at the moment (even with the epidural).
All of your prayers and positive thoughts worked wonders - thank you all. Please keep them coming for a speedy recovery.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Meggie is really keen to go riding again this weekend so I'm going to make a few calls now to see if I can book it. Thanks to everyone for texts, facebook messages, emails and phone calls......we appreciate every single one of them, so even though we don't reply individually, please know that you're making a difference.