Friday, May 22, 2009

Arrrrggggghhhhhhh!

I'm sick! I've got myself a cold and cough so couldn't go into hospital with Meg for her chemo. Phil's had to take her which is absolutely fine; I know Meg will be very well taken care of by her Daddy. It's just me! I feel really weird not being with her. I keep texting and calling to talk to her; it's so frustrating. I know it couldn't be helped, getting sick, but I still feel like I'm letting her down by not being there. I just like to know exactly what's happening and make sure they don't forget anything....silly I know.... I can't even visit because the ward staff have told me not to visit until I'm well. I thought I was feeling a bit better yesterday, but I've woken up this morning feeling really wretched, and have a temp of 38, so I'm hoping this is the worst day and I start to improve quickly so I can be with Meg. Apparently it's a problem for a number of parents on ward 3B at the moment. There's a nasty strain of the cold going around and it could be very serious for the children if they got it as they're all immuno-compromised. I think I'll go down to the hospital anyway and wavethrough the window to her from outside - I might not be the only parent there!

So, if you have any miracle remedies to get rid of a cold quickly, please pass them on! Thanks!
J xxx

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Last one.....(hopefully)

Hi Everyone. So sorry for the long gap in between posts. I'm now back at work and I seem to run around like a headless chicken most of the time!

Well, as the title of the post says, we're going in on Friday for what we're hoping and praying will be Meg's last cycle of chemo. I'm so glad for her that she feels that this part of her journey is coming to an end, but I'm not jumping up and down about it because I know that her cancer is very unpredictable. We just have to say goodbye to that part of the journey and hope that we never have to face bad news again.

Once this cycle of chemo is over, Meg has to go through loads of tests again to see what the chemo has done, and then, if "all clear" she'll go to having monthly blood tests indefinitely. The way that they'll be able to tell if anything is going on will be from her AFP (Alpha Feta Protein) level. Her oncologist has said that she has a 50% chance of the cancer not coming back. If it does come back, it depends WHEN it comes back. If it's in a few years time, then she can be treated again with the same protocol of chemo that she's just had. If the cancer returns sooner than that, then we have a very serious problem in that there isn't anything else that they can treat her with. As you can imagine, we don't even want to "go there". We have to believe that she's going to be fine and well and that this vile disease is gone from her body.

Meg's doing really well at the moment. She's got colour in her cheeks, and enough energy to have a really good scrap with her sister on a fairly regular basis, so she's obviously feeling OK! Obviously this next cycle will knock her down again, but she always bounces back quickly even though with each one she gets more and more depleted.

I just can't wait for her to be able to get back to some sort of normality; start a sport, grow her hair so I can go back to nagging her to wash it again!! I can't believe that she's been bald (apart from a brief spell during remission) for a year. She's starting to think about what she would like for her "Make a Wish". They like the children to make their wish when they're off treatment. She's still veering towards a cruise! Great choice Meg :)!

Last weekend, we had a very special treat..... Our lovely friend Lisa had organised for a chef (Ritz London trained no less!) to come to our house and cook for us! Meg chose the menu, and we had a group of friends come along as well. What a meal! Meg loved it and asked if Chef Richard could come and cook for us every weekend! I wish! We ate amazing antipasto, traditional roast beef and the most fantastic roasties and yorkies ever, followed by creme brulee. It was wonderful. And he washed up afterwards!!

So....two more days and then back to Hotel 3B for 6 days, and then who knows what.......? I'm believing, praying, hoping that my feisty redhead will be well for a long, long time, and be able to go back to being a normal, carefree child again.

Keep those prayers and positive thoughts flying through to us!

Jane xxxxx