"Sigh"......

We're back to PMH tomorrow and starting all of Meggie's tests. CT scan, bone scan, kidney function, hearing test, blood tests..... and then the waiting for the results.........It all sounds pretty straightforward but there are a lot of needles, infusions of tracers and blood taking involved, so Meg's not looking forward to it at all.


I had a "meltdown" again this morning. It came from nowhere and it's many hours later now and I still feel so......not sure what the word is........dread-ful, as in, full of dread.....and afraid....... I suppose it's because I know that we're coming closer to knowing whether the chemo and surgery have done what we want them to do, and if they have, which I'm fully expecting, then we're going to be watching, worrying and waiting every month for the results of blood tests. I know that sounds terribly negative, and most of the time, I'm really not negative. I'm just so scared.....



Meg's had lots of fun during the time we're been free of hospital visits (almost three weeks!) She's had two whole weeks at school and she's started riding lessons, and spends as much tme as she can at the stables, looking after the horses, mucking out, tacking up and generally learning about the groundwork of horse care. She even has her own jodphurs and looks fab in them! The other girls at the stables are really lovely to Meg, and she feels very welcome there. Yesterday I took her for her riding lesson at 8am and she spent the rest of the day helping out, and got a free ride at the end of the day and did her first jump which she was absolutely delighted about. Phil went to collect her and it was pouring with rain so when she called me from the car after the ride I asked her if she was drenched and she said she was so I said I'd have a nice warm bath ready for her when she got home. She said "No! I want to keep smelling like horse!!" How gorgeous......